| New Pet |
[Nov. 16th, 2006|07:00 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  determined | ] |
 Awwwwwwwwww! I will have you... And smother you with love. |
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|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 29th, 2006|11:56 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  optimistic | ] |
Fist time...
I feel like...
Pap...
Once a year!?
Vagina. |
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|
| My stitches.. |
[Jun. 24th, 2006|10:17 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  Bloody | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Ladytron - international dateline | ] |
So, I had a little accident today...
7 STITCHES!
This was not a failed suicide attempt.
This was a horrific accident involving...
1) Tile Nippers
2) Ceramic Tile
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|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jun. 14th, 2006|11:18 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  Inconsolable | ] |
The time is coming.
I can hear it snickering back there, back where? Not to far away…And if the wind catches it the right way, it whispers to me, cold and clammy, and I cannot believe, CANNOT BELIEVE that old age is coming.
I will lose my mobility.I will lose my freedom.I will lose my mind.I will lose my friends to cancer, heart disease, stroke, and suicide.
The smell?
Well, that’s simple.
1 cup moth balls
2 cup formaldehyde
1 teaspoon urine
½ cup death
Replaced hips, cracking bones, arthritis, dentures, urinary tract infections, Osteoporosis, loss of hearings, loss of vision - possibly blindness, memory loss – delirium, falling, neglect, abuse, blouses with flowers, knitting, gardening, bird watching, diapers…
Lets not forget that BEFORE the senile kicks in we have menopause.
Dry vagina
Hot flashs
Beards
Kurt Cobain was on to something – die young – leave a good looking corpse. |
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|
| "the natural institution of marriage." |
[Jun. 6th, 2006|05:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  OUTRAGED! | ] |
Declaring the traditional family a threatened institution
condemned:
contraception
same-sex marriage
abortion
in-vitro fertilization
"Never before in history has human procreation, and therefore the family, which is its natural place, been so threatened as in today's culture''
In a condemnation to technological answers to infertility, such as artificial insemination and in-vitro fertilization, it said human beings should be made "of a human act in the full sense of the term: the union between a man and a woman"
"Couples made up of homosexuals claim similar rights to those reserved to husband and wife; they even claim the right to adoption. Women who live a lesbian union claim similar rights, demanding laws which give them access to hetero fertilization or embryo implantation. Moreover it is claimed that the help of the law to form these unusual couples goes hand in hand with the help to divorce and repudiate"
Dear Pope Benedict XVI,
Evolve.
Your's truely,
V.
ps. pssssst - Your hands are above the international gayline...
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|
|
| (no subject) |
[Mar. 9th, 2006|07:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
Sebastian said it best.
"It's better down where it's wetter"
|
|
|
| Girls With Guns |
[Dec. 21st, 2005|07:29 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | complacent | ] |
Hot...So hot.
Yes? |
|
|
| Larami Hasbro Super Soaker MAX-D 5000 |
[Nov. 17th, 2005|08:08 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  nostalgic | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Chumbawamba - The Good Ship Lifestyle | ] |
I miss you Mario.
I miss you Simon.
I miss you playground and marbles.
I miss you Micro Machines.
Cards, Heman, Detentions, Cindi Lauper, Pre-cloning.
Before PS2 & Starbucks. Before Bush, 911, and my personal Dept. Before Karla killed her sister and back when cryonic suspension was pretend. Before Max Payne and Survivor.
Before Dolly was cloned and Britney Spears.
Before Ketchup was purple, West Nile and caller ID.
Dear Healthcare System, Naivety, Mama, Make Believe,
Where have you gone? |
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|
| Tell me now... |
[Nov. 3rd, 2005|10:05 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  bored | ] |
What do you think?
 |
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|
| I will steal your wife Raine-just to hurt you. |
[Nov. 1st, 2005|06:50 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  cranky | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Tea Party - Temptation | ] |
1. Billy Corgan is a whiney bitch. Sing like a man you sissy transgendered...sissy.
2. Anthony Kiedis (Red hot chilli peppers) is hearing impaired AND has a speech impediment? Who gave this guy a record deal? And which one of YOU assholes is supporting this band?
3. Raine (our lady peace) is a talentless AND whiney asshole. Please listen to the lyrics in 'supermans dead'.
Random oooing and awing in place of words? What terrible thing happened to you when you wrote this song you dickless jackass? I don't know if it's LACK of vocabulary or maybe just a ghastly fear of multisyllable words?
I seriously wished I had been part of the liberals stealing all those monies from us taxpayers. You know what I would have done with it? I would have PAID FM 96 to NEVER EVER play the smashing pumpkins, our lady peace OR the red hot chilli dinkies AGAIN. Ever.
AH Puke.
I am equally outraged every time they come on.
My breathing speeds
My hands clench
My eyes squint
My heart races
My teeth grit
I walk over to the radio and RIP the cord feeding the music machine RIGHT outta the wall.
But the rage doesn't go away. No.
It stays with me. Anywhere from 10 minutes, up to 2 days.
OH yes.
>:/
ALSO, I am out of mayo. I BOILED MY eggs and NOW I find I am out of mayo.
So, regretfully
I ate:
21 cheesies
1 bite of cheese
1 bite of rotten chicken wing
10 bites of ten different donuts, none of which belonged to me.
1 bite of white macaroni salad
1 bite of orange macaroni salad
1 glass of vanilla coke
Things, sadly, I did not eat:
6 blue smarties
3 tacos
1 spoon of nutella
26 peanuts
5 slices of cucumber |
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|
| Halloweeg |
[Oct. 30th, 2005|10:58 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  devious | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Death Cab Form Cutie - Soul Meets Body | ] |
There's a G in halloween?
Nah.
WTF n00b?
Ok, so, halloween? yes yes...very nice.
Except...
I drank too much wine.
ah yes.
I have never in my LIFE puked and then puked again because puking was SO gross.
Recipe:
43 pumpkin seeds
2 cupcakes
9 stolen candy corn. (candy corn was invented in the 1880s)
2.5 bottles of wine
*puke*
SOooo, we had a mermaid, the play boy bunny, a fallen angel, a devil, a suicide victim, a ravaged whore (roki, you are troubled) a cross dresser, two homos, a communist, a slut, an evil bride and a goth chick? I don't know, what was nat? oh, and Will...Will was 'Will with a hat'.
*ahem*
He didn't win any best costume prizes.
Justin & "THE" Pedo-glasses.
K-Dog deep throatin' our bread...
K-Dog taking the man meat from the big homo with the bread vag...
WA ha ha ha!
Randa's suicide attempt after the deep throating incident?
 |
|
|
| Gnome Hamradio Utilities? |
[Oct. 26th, 2005|08:16 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | drained | ] |
| [ | music |
| | System of a down - BYOB | ] |
It would be true, if I said that I smoked a big joint and drew the conversation K-dog and I were having...
I wouldn't feed you...
*whispers*
Lies... |
|
|
| The end is near... |
[Oct. 25th, 2005|06:04 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | chipper | ] |
1:3
beatus qui legit et qui audiunt
verba prophetiae et servant ea quae
n ea scripta sunt tempus enim prope est |
|
|
| Estimated Deaths in Canada? Zip. |
[Oct. 7th, 2005|03:53 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | disappointed | ] |
I dreamt that a man at the gas station walked over to me and asked me if I was familiar with the term 'Misanthrope'.
I said, absolutely.
He smiled and walked away.
What is the significance of this?
Or should I say "what does it all meeeeean?"
I suspect that it how the dead/aliens mock us.
Bottom line:
Gas prices are obscene and I almost hit a deer yesterday. |
|
|
| The Conversationalist |
[Oct. 3rd, 2005|10:27 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | complacent | ] |
| [ | music |
| | The pussycat dolls - Don't Cha | ] |
I had a conversation with a botnamed alice.
It went a little like this:
Human: you are funny
ALICE: Thanks you make me laugh too.
Human: can you laugh?
ALICE: No but I can smile
Human: you just said i made you laugh
ALICE: Don't put words in my mouth.
Human: what?
ALICE: Are you confused?
Miranda had a conversation with Alice:
Human: Lies again!You are a computer, you have no free will.
ALICE: Tut mir leid, darauf habe ich keinen Zugriff!
Human: Whatever, Hitler.
ALICE: Some say he was the most evil man who ever lived.
Alice |
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silicone_clown's journal
tired
crazy